I am Awesome!

I just realized how I awesome I was today both at work & socially. I had some excellent breakthrough at meetings, problem solving, and important lessons I learned about myself that is going to benefit to push beyond who I am. I have learned to be more relaxed, centered, and focused. I was in a very flow state today. I have learned who I am beyond the surface level. I knew what I was doing, and was matured about dealing with difficulties. I earned respect & recognition. I understood that I must give 100% focus on task at hand no matter how small it is. I also understood what it means to take 100% responsibility on anything.

I am awesome! :)
Yea, I am bragging because this is my personal blog. Don't ruin this moment!

Choosing right actions over emotions

I had an excellent work out early morning before driving to office, enjoyed healthy oat meal, had positive thoughts as soon as I woke up, and do other normal routines that help me to go above and beyond than most people. I am destined for starting a wonderful day!

But around noon in my office, I started to feel not right. This is not a caffeine crush because I don't drink coffee, and I had good salad for lunch. I just don't feel right because I just completed a big project last week, and now I have some free time to slack off. It didn't feel right, and I felt miserable inside to be doing less. I am a workaholic. I hate not feeling "right"!

Then I asked myself few interesting questions, "Have I done all the right things I am supposed to today?", "Have I acted in the right way to move towards my long term goal?".  The answer was close to "Yes". Then I realized my everyday chores are boring, but they are still the right things to do. Even though there will be days my journey towards my bigger goals will suck, and I would feel crappy for no fucking reason, I should still remind myself that it's the right actions that are more important than my emotions.

I know there are spiritual teachers that tell that emotions & feelings don't lie. That's right. I agree with that. But for getting the things done appropriately, I believe "right actions" take precedence over "right emotions". Just because I am feeling sad and lazy doesn't mean that I am allowed to miss my work out today. Just because I incredibly in a good mood doesn't mean I am allowed to enjoy the moments by eating junk food. Just because people are watching doesn't mean I can't approach that cute girl in the corner.  Emotions don't usually lie; but I think it misguide us to do the wrong thing if we aren't careful enough. It's better to remain objective to my emotions. For now on - right actions over emotions!

Am I Enough?

I woke up 10 AM at Sunday morning, and there is that one familiar feeling I get for many year no matter how good or bad the previous day went by. It's feeling of emptiness. It's almost as if I feel like I am not doing enough. I could work harder  and smarter than I am to be happier, healthier, and wiser.

I have been reading for this interesting book recently which talks about slightest change over a longer period of time makes bigger impact and momentum in life. There are no such thing as magic pill. So today I asked a different question. Am I doing little bit enough everyday to reach my ambitions so that five years from now my goals are going to be actualized? The answer was Yes!

I have been following through  those small habit everyday for a long time to reach my goals - workout, business ventures etc. It's a common sense they will all add up to be a person I will become may be a year from now. The book also talks about common expectations people have - they want quick fix for a problem i.e. having six pack abs within 30 days, making a million dollar by winning lottery, meeting soul mates by getting drunk every Friday and Saturday night (I know someone who does), or wishing god has better plans!

They key thing to remember from this post is that tiny, inconsequential daily discipline for a longer period of time makes the person you are. If you are pretty regular in the gym five days a week, and have clean diets, you would eventually have an awesome body. The feeling of emptiness will always be there for you. I kind of believe that's part of being a human. I think I interpreted that "feeling of emptiness" as I am not doing enough. That's my old, faulty belief trying to trick to get a quick fix for solutions! Some people might interpret that totally different. Let me know what's yours!

Chasing After Happiness

Tuesday noon at work, I got a text from my date last weekend and it kind of made me so ecstatic that I could not stop smiling for couple hours, and felt so good.  I treated everyone little bit more better and become more social. I suddenly realized at one point during those moments that it's just not hearing from some blonde that made me happy because I get texts from some girls through out the week. It's just me deciding to be happy. Somehow my brain interpreted that miniscule text to be so desirable that it made me choose to be happy. This is so stupid!

I know I want to enjoy companionship with women because it makes me happy, but do women really make me happy? It's not like I am saying I am thinking whether I am considering being a homosexual, or an asexual hermit who refrain from sex. I am saying whether I could be less rely on women to attain my happiness. I can't control how other people treat me every day; it's not consistent. I have days some girls give me a hard time, and there are days they made me feel like a rockstar.

But how I treat myself every single day could be consistent. I choose to smile, I chose to have confident posture, and I choose to treat people little bit more better. By doing all these, I could be happy and ecstatic all by myself. May be happiness is just a choice? 

What Are Better Goals?

I think best goals are the ones that builds your characters and are more process-driven. That means "showing off six pack abs and packing 15 lb of muscle" is a good and specific goal. But setting a goal to lift weight at least 3 times a week for rest of the year is a better goal. It helps to build a character and make someone more process-driven. I won't get too much disappointed if I can't make it to 9% body fat to get my 6 pack abs, or eat more food to make it to 15 pound of muscle mass. All it matters is that I focused on enjoying the process, and at least follow through. That actually is much more rewarding than the outcome because in the end you become someone better, stronger, and efficient than 365 days ago. You become a better person than most average people who just live their lives, go with flow, and depends on luck. Here are few examples to compare bad, good and better goals -

Here are some "bad" goals:

1. I will lose some weight this year to make myself look better.
2. I want to quit smoking, and go cold turkey.
3. I will get a better job.

Here are "good" version (more specific & has deadline) of the goals:

1. I will drop my body fat to 10% by losing 15 pounds, and pack at least 10 or more pounds of muscle mass by December 30, 2014.
2. I will read 10 quit smoking related books, and completely stop smoking till July 30, 2014 
3. I will submit resumes to 1000 places to get 30 job interviews by December 30, 2014.

Here are "better" version (more specific, has deadline, and process driven) of the goals:

1. I will drop my body fat to 10% by losing 15 pounds, and pack at least 10 or more pounds of muscle mass by December 30, 2014. I will lift weight 3 or more time a week (that is non-negotiable), and plan my daily food intake (calorie surplus/deficit) every week which I will follow through no matter what.
2. I will read 10 quit smoking related books, and completely stop smoking till December 30, 2014. I will drop my smoking to only 2 cigarettes per week until I get comfortable to quit completely.  
3. I will submit resumes to 1000 places to get 30 job interviews by December 30, 2014. I will apply for 2 or more jobs every day for the remaining part of the year, attend at least 1 social event per month to network with professional to grab few business cards, and perform 2 or more cold calls once a week.

The process I mentioned mayn't be effective. I just wrote them down to prove my point. Even if you can't reach your goals by the end of the year, you can at least give yourself a pat in your back to follow through until the end. Achieving goal doesn't mean a shit. It will make you feel better for couple days, then you go back to normal. It's much better if you make something out of yourself while achieving goals - by being disciplined, consistent, hardworking, methodical, social, courageous etc.

Hope it helps to shed some light on making better goals!