Kari-Lynn

I think there are special people we luckily meet in our lives who immediately makes us feel better. I met someone today who really made me rejuvenated. I was burned out and little sad because I had to let go of someone close to me today. I was frustrated and felt challenged. So it was truly a blessing to meet her, and I am glad I had that stimulating conversation!

Unintentional Benefit

There are things that we do without wanting to take any credits for and end up getting recognized. I had one of those weeks. I had to catch up with one of my project, but I was moved to a different project to look into an issue business are having. It took me so much time from my current project, that I ended up working during my 2 days that were supposed to be my vacation. I didn't care much because I just want to meet my project deadline. I have a proven record to get all project done on schedule, but my current project will not be any different. But somehow it really made 2 of my project managers kind of upset that I worked my days off. They said they really appreciate I am taking initiative, but hopefully we don't have to work my days off again. They felt little guilt that I had to go through this. I am glad there are people who appreciate what I do.

Happy Birthday!

I turned 26 today. Not a big accomplishment, but my birthday forces me to look back my past 12 months and see if my life has been changed for the better. To be honest, it actually did. My birthday is like a "new year day" for myself.  I have changed a lot and my life situations have been changed. The doors that were closed are now open. I am more ambitious and capable than I ever could be in my life. I have formed new & exciting relationships which I thought wasn't even possible. I am a different person now. I am more grateful, happy and in control than the last ten years of my life. Well done!!!

I do have one promise to myself. Next year is going to be so much exciting. Fun has just started!

Doubt vs. Believe

Ever since I was growing up, I have learned not to put faith in others. I always believed that disappointment is a law of nature similar to gravity. You can't completely trust someone because humans are imperfect creature, full of mistakes and unpredictability. I think that's okay. I have learned to use these imperfections as an advantage. I always watch my back and always took responsibility because I know no one will be there when my life is fucked up. I felt misunderstood during my upbringings, and always wanted to be desired and approved by others (which I think is a sign of weakness).

But nowadays, I realized I want to believe in others even if there is a minor chance of disappointment. I want to believe they will succeed to the fullest. I want to believe they will be happy and live a blessed life. There was a time, I always wished people believed in me, and now I am on my own, I will try my best to believe in others as much as I can. I think believing in your friends or signifiant others is the greatest gift you can ever give them. It's a sign that you genuinely care about them. Don't just encourage them half-heartedly; believe they could be the best. May be just making them think that someone is there looking up to them is enough to ignite something they actually need to be more successful.

It makes me feel weird just to write this blog post because this is unlike me. I guess a psychopath like me can change.