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Saturday, September 8, 2012

How Being A Perfectionist Kills Me?

I'm a perfectionists. Whenever I decide to write a post, I want to give hundred ten percent and make it worth to read. Most of the time it never happens, and honestly I have deleted 5-10 posts from my <insert Anything Cool Here> site. I'm beginning to think that being "perfectionist" is my greatest weaknesses. For example, I am working on a new project this week and received requirements from my internal customers (i.e. business analysts). I usually write all my questions and doubts in an email to get clarity in the requirements they send me. I want everything to be perfect. I want my creation (i.e. software features) to be bug free and beautifully made. I want to be the most gifted software developer ever exists! So, I end up spending hours writing emails to business associates and proof them dozen times. Sometimes backspacing couple more sentences in every proof read. Sigh!

My perfectionists nature also kicks in when I am writing a text message to my friends. It needs to be perfect. It needs to be mysterious. It needs to gain attention. It needs to make them love me. I pretty much spend 5-10 minutes pondering before even put my fingers in my iPhone touch; sometimes backspacing few sentences in order to look "cool" or "less desperate"...whatever is more beautiful. I know how ridiculous it sounds, but it's a true story. These are one of my few occasions in my life.

I'm sure you are already feeling sorry for me. I'm not writing to make myself look like a freak (all human beings are crazy in some ways), but my purpose of this post is to admit I'm taking responsibility in this "perfectionist" nature. I believe this is a gift and a curse.Today I have decided that I am going to write this trashy posts and not going to delete it. I'm going to post it even if it is imperfect and make me look like a low life. Moreover, I'm gonna send few emails tomorrow and work on my project just to get it above average; but not to make it "perfect". Are you proud of me now?