Suffering For Dummies

In last few years of my life, I have been chasing after happiness. I always have the wet fantasy that if I achieve bigger things, I will be more fulfilled and live happily ever after. In one of my blog post, I talked about filling the void for achieving the purpose of life. One of my purpose was to end all sufferings in my life. It's not a like I actually suffer from people and situations. I actually suffer by myself. I suffer by my unreal expectations of myself and the world. I suffer from not getting what I want faster. There is always that uneasiness buzzing in the background and my mind is always creating unresolved drama. I am a very ordinary and predictable guy, but there is still so much drama going inside of me. I sometimes wonder what's going on other people's mind? Are they happy and ease with themselves?

So I kind of come to a theory that there is no such thing as ending suffering. Suffering is similar to the laws of gravity. It's always going to be there. We don't blame gravity when the plane crashes or someone fall down from the roof. In the same way, we shouldn't blame being suffered and being in pain. I think there is always a way to minimize my suffering by taking positive actions and letting go of those emotions, but I don't believe we could permanently end suffering. All these mind tricks few personal development workshops teach us, such as, letting go of emotions, setting greater goals, raising standards, having personal mission statements are going to make me way happier than most people. But I don't think that will end sufferings. That's an unrealistic expectation.

So I don't want to end my my sufferings. I want to bring pain more in my life in the same way I bring happiness. I want to be cheated, betrayed, humiliated, rejected, embarrassed, lost and feeling hopelessness. Because in that way I can fully feel it and appreciate the joy and happiness. There is no such thing as happily ever after. There is no such thing as living my dreams (how could it be a dream if you are already experiencing it?). There is no such thing as greater calling. We born, we live and we die. Suffering is simply part of us and we should embrace it!